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  HURRICANE BUTTERFLY

  A novel by

  MeChelle Vermeulen

  Published by MeChelle Vermeulen

  This book is intended for mature adults only.

  Copyright © MeChelle Vermeulen, 2014

  Cover Design by Sarah Hansen from Okay Creations

  Editing by Chelsea Kuhel

  Proofread by Jeri Walker-Bickett

  e-book formatting by Guido Henkel

  No part of this book may be reproduced or transmitted in any form or by any means, electronic or mechanical, including photocopying, recording or by any information storage and retrieval system without the written permission of the author, except for the use of brief quotations in a book review.

  This book is a work of fiction. Names, characters, places and incidents either are the products of the author’s imagination or are used fictitiously. Any resemblance to actual persons, living or dead, events or locations is entirely coincidental.

  All rights reserved. Except as permitted under the U.S Copyright Act of 1976 no part of this publication mat be reproduces, distributed or transmitted in any other form or by any means, or stored in a database or retrieval system, without the prior express, written consent of the author.

  Acknowledgements

  To my husband, my best friend and my rock, for dealing with my scattered mind and everything else while I was creating this book. I love you.

  To my boys (my angels), Timothy & Robin, thank you for your love & support.

  To my Mom, Dad and sisters, CheRene and ShanDre, for your unselfish support and encouragement-Thank you! You are the wind beneath my wings.

  To Ronel, Lisa, Ula, Yassamin & Tina-my ‘fan club’. Thank you for your friendship and support!

  To my beta readers & advisors, Jenny, Nadine and Moe-Thank you for reading every page, and for telling me when it sucks, and when I nailed it.

  To Tracey-Thank you for being my ‘second eyes’ and giving me the peace of mind to let it go…finally!

  To all of my friends, old and new, that helped me along the way, thank you for your relentless support and understanding.

  If I forgot anyone, this is for you~THANK YOU!

  Prologue

  ~11 months ago~

  My heart slams against my chest as the bedroom door closes. Matt leads me further into the darkness, his fingers curled around mine. The smell of wet socks and aftershave hangs in the air, and suddenly a feeling of trepidation grabs at me. We’ve been together for four months, and we’ve been making out, but this is it; tonight I am going to lose my virginity.

  I suppose it is time. I am a twenty-year-old virgin, which is lame by Alice’s standards. She lost her virginity in the back of a truck when she was eighteen.

  I stumble over something wet on the floor, “Sorry, the room’s a bit of a mess,” he offers, his blue eyes looking at me through wayward light blonde curls.

  I smile but cringe inwardly, “It’s fine.” My words come out under my breath, as my eyes grow more accustomed to the dark.

  “Stay there,” he says as he releases my hand. A moment later the room floods with the faint yellow glow of a naked light bulb on a wooden lamp. The lamp sits between stacks of books and empty cups. He takes a bunch of keys and a phone from his pocket and places them next to the coffee mug, then turns to me.

  “There, that’s better.”

  My eyes scan the messy room and then the unmade bed, of which he quickly adjusts the covers, gathers the clothes in a bundle in his arms, and pushes them into the overflowing dresser drawers.

  “Did you want something to drink, a Coke…‌or maybe something stronger?” He walks towards me and takes my hands in his.

  Maybe that’s not such a bad idea if I’m going to get through this. I like him, a lot; he is nice, but a bit clumsy when it comes to the romantic side of things. We met in the pub downtown. He came from Seattle to do six months of field training before graduating as an Animal Control Officer.

  I recognized the brunette batting her lashes at him. She worked at the diner, and she was trying hard to get his attention, but he kept looking at me. After a while, he excused himself and came over. He was fun, laid back, and easy to be with.

  “I’m fine.” I bite my lip trying to hide my angst. Funny that after four months he still can’t tell. I guess he is just one of those guys who can’t read a girl’s body language.

  “You’re so pretty, Sophie.” His hand moves to my face, tugging my blonde hair behind my ear. His fingers feel rough against my skin.

  “I really like you, a lot.” He closes the gap between us, leaning in. I lift my head up to meet his lips. It feels dry and chapped, but I go with it, putting my arms around his neck. His tongue pokes into my mouth; it feels cold and hard. His fingers creep to the edge of my top. I lift my arms up, and he pulls it over my head. He has got a lion tattooed on his chest, the head of a bear on his shoulder and a seashell with the name ‘Cindy’ on his side.

  I avert my eyes back to his, and his rugged hands clamp around my waist as he lowers his head and starts kissing my neck and shoulders. He wets his lips before skimming my jaw line, then my mouth, but I turn my head away, and he pulls back, his eyes tracing over my face as we move to the edge of the bed. He pushes me back onto the bed and I can feel his erection pressing against the inside of my thighs.

  “Are you sure?” he says under his breath as he starts undoing my shorts.

  Actually, no, I’m not, or maybe it’s just nerves. “Uhm,” my voice is shaky as I clench my hands in fists against my chest.

  “It’s okay to be nervous, just relax.” He doesn’t waste any time and pulls my denim shorts off, then makes quick work of removing his pants.

  He leans over me, pushing in between my legs, his erection now pressing against the thin layer of material. Instead of being aroused, I freeze. I’m just not feeling it. I wish he would just stop. Suddenly his phone starts vibrating rather violently on the bedside table. I turn my head and see the cell phone rattling on top of a book.

  He lifts his head from my stomach, which he has been kissing with his sandpaper lips. “Shit,” he huffs.

  I let out a relieved breath. “What’s wrong?” I ask as he hovers over me, reaching for the phone.

  “Shit, it’s work. It’s my off weekend so this better be good.” He scratches his brow looking at me lying with my fists still clenched against my chest.

  “Don’t worry; I’ll take care of it.”

  “What?” he answers in a clipped tone. I waste no time sitting up and folding my arms over my chest as he moves to the edge of the bed.

  “Where’s Duncan?” He shakes his head. “Okay, fine, I’m just in the middle of something; l’ll be there in a bit.”

  I sit up, looking for my shirt amidst the piles of clothes on the floor. “What’s wrong?”

  “Duncan’s broke his ankle, and Duke’s gone AWOL. A local called in about some puppies that have to be removed from a shed. The police are there and all, some illegal dog fighting.”

  He puts his hand on my leg. “Look, I don’t have to be there for another twenty minutes or so. We still have some time. “

  I feel my stomach drop as he turns back to me. I can’t do it. I pull myself up with my hands over my chest. “Uhm, actually, it’s late. I should probably get going.” I try to swallow the lump in my throat.

  He folds his lips around his teeth, nodding slowly. “Are you sure, I mean…“

  I don’t let him finish. “Yeah, it’s fine, really, don’t worry about it.”

  He leans over and hands me my top. I pulled it on as quickly as I can. We get dressed in silence, and ten minutes later, we’re in his truck driving down the ma
in street of Port Angeles to the other side of town where I live, and I’m secretly grateful that this thing didn’t happen. I guess I wasn’t as ready as I thought I was. His phone buzzes again, and he picks it up, a bit more annoyed than the first time.

  “I’m on my way. What? Shit! Okay, okay I’m coming.”

  He looks over at me, “I’m so sorry to ask, but I really need to get there ASAP. It won’t take long, and then I’ll take you home?”

  What was I going to say, after all, I just got him all worked up for nothing? “Sure, I don’t mind.”

  He smiles. “Thanks, I promise I’ll make it up to you.”

  When we arrive, Matt gets out and talks to the police. The officer told him the bitch and the owner is inside the house. I watched as they walk to the shed to get the pups. Just then, from the corner of my eye something black bounces in the tall grass. It is one of the pups heading towards the road. I get out and pick him up when voices from all directions catch my attention.

  My eyes sweep to the officer yelling with his hands up, and then I see it, the lactating female heading straight towards me. I hear Matt call out my name as I turn my back towards her and reach for the door, but it is too late. I have the yelping pup in my hands when she jumps me from behind.

  I don’t remember much from that point on, except hearing two shots being fired at close range, then falling to the ground with the pup clenched to my chest. The first week in the hospital is hell. They keep me on my stomach to have better access to the wounds on my back and right shoulder. The pain is immense, and I am kept under sedation for the first few nights because of the nightmares of a big black dog with red eyes standing at the edge of my bed, fangs dripping with blood.

  Ben and Alice visit a few times a day, and Matt comes around too, but it is clear that this wasn’t what he signed up for. I decide to break it off when I get out of the hospital, but he beats me to it. The day before I am due to be released he comes by with a mason jar of sweet tea, compliments of Jimmy, the barman at the pub where we used to hang out. He knew it was my favorite.

  His eyes betray him the moment he sets foot inside my room. We are history. He carefully leans over and kisses me on the forehead, then sits down on the edge of the chair, fiddling with the pocket of his pants. We talk about work, school and then, he blurts it out. I wait for the ache, but there is nothing, instead I feel relieved that I am free.

  I always thought that falling in love should feel like jumping from a cliff. A fall that scares you as much as it excites you, that leaves you breathless and wanting more. The impossible kind…‌that ruins you for everyone else.

  This wasn’t it, and my chances of finding it have just become harder. I am not the same girl that I was before. Finding that special guy prepared to carry my load with me, would be one in a million, a fairytale come true, and just maybe, an impossible dream…

  Chapter 1

  ~Present day~

  The sun crept along the forest floor up to the house as I sat on my bed with my pen and diary staring at the blank page. My therapist suggested that I keep a diary, that way I can track my emotional, as well as physical progress, but just as the pages in the diary, I feel empty. It seems that getting my life back is proving to be much harder than I expected.

  Mr. Pepper, our ten-year-old tabby cat lies on the edge of the bed in the sun. He is old and drools on everything, which freaks Alice out. The house is warm and cozy, with books and crochet blankets draped over every couch and bed. My grandfather built this cedar wood cottage for Nana about thirty-five years ago. It has an incredible view of the lake and mountains, with none of the hustle and bustle of the city.

  After graduation, I enrolled at the College to study Early Childhood Education and had finished my 1st year when the attack happened. Since then, I’ve studied from home, but it is going slow, and I am worried that I might never reach my dream, that is to teach. I’ve always been good with kids and when the time came, teaching seemed like the natural choice. My mother had me when she was very young. She left when I was five, and I’ve never seen her again.

  She told Nana she never wanted to be a mom, and that she’d only end up ruining my life, but I think it’s more the other way around. Maybe that was part of the reason I’ve only wanted to be a mom, to have my own babies to love and nurture. I suppose teaching and working with kids is the closest to filling that void in my life. Besides catching up on my studies, my plan is to shop for a new wardrobe, which I hope will give me the boost I need to get my confidence back.

  My surgery involved stretching the skin and muscle flaps over the wound on my right shoulder and back, leaving me with ugly scars. The days of wearing my ribbed cotton tanks are over. Before it happened, my life was so very different. I used to love going for walks around town taking photos with my vintage Canon wind-up, swimming in the lakes with Ben and Alice, and lying on the back of his truck underneath the stars talking for hours, now it all seemed so far away.

  I am still working on shaking my fear of dogs, which is hard because everyone around here has a dog, and for that reason, I had not been out as much as I usually would have been, and I wondered if I would ever be able to get over my crippling fear.

  One of the people without whom I could not have made it through was Ben. He moved here from Seattle almost four years ago. We met in front of the Pizza Hut when he helped us get Alice’s old Toyota to start. He towed the car to our house, and then spent the afternoon working underneath the hood. Alice has had a crush on him since day one, but he didn’t seem to notice, so she’s accepted, like I’m sure girls sometimes do when faced with such a predicament, that having him as a friend is better than not having any part of him.

  Ben is twenty-five years old, with slightly tanned skin, a strong angular jaw that he keeps covered with a short beard, and piercing blue eyes with straight messy brows. He loves wearing beanies and plaid shirts of which Alice has stolen a few to sleep in. (Tip: Broken - in cotton plaid shirts sleep the best) He is tall and very well-built with tattoos on his thick muscular forearms. He grew up in Seattle and came back to Port Angeles to take care of his alcoholic father, and now he works as a Ranger at the Olympic National Park.

  Alice moved to Port Angeles from Boston with her mom when she was fourteen. We are the same age. Where I have fair skin, blonde hair, and blue eyes, she is dark and tanned with dark brown hair and big hazel eyes. Even with her slight dyslexia, it’s always been her dream to become a reporter. After school, she got a job in the mailroom at the Daily News, and since then she’s been promoted to a reporter. She has recently applied for the job of Featured Editor in Seattle, which combined the two things she loved most, writing and photography.

  Yesterday afternoon Nana left to visit her friend in Chicago, and tonight Alice and Ben are coming over for dinner. I brush my teeth and opt for my glasses instead of contacts, then pull on a pair of comfy grey yoga pants and a sweater. My body hasn’t changed that much since I was fourteen. I am stuck at the same height of five feet four inches. I wish I had curves like Alice, but then she always complained about her unruly hair and big boobs. I grab the laundry basket with one hand and start collecting the washing that lay all over the bathroom floor, and then tidy my room and downstairs.

  Alice said she is working late on a piece she had to do as part of her new job, and Ben usually swings by after work. One thing I inherited from Nana is my love for cooking and baking, and today I am making Ben’s favorite, strawberry swirl cupcakes with whipped cream icing and loaded chicken pasta for dinner.

  I spoon the first batch into the cupcake pan and pop it into the oven when my phone buzzes. It’s Alice.

  “You’re up?” she says chewing on something.

  “No, this is Sophie’s clone.”

  She snorts at me.”Ha ha, very funny.”

  “Any news about the job?” I ask licking some frosting from the spoon.

  “Nah, it’s probably too soon, but Brett said he’ll let me know as soon as the
shortlist lands on Mr. Compton’s desk.”

  “Who’s Brett?”

  “He’s the Editor-in-Chief’s P.A.” It sounds like she goes away for a bit. “Shit, hang on.”

  “What…” I clamp the phone between my ear and shoulder as she talks to someone in the background.

  “I have to go, Brittany-Bitch-Face has just fucked up my feature article. I’ll see you later, okay?”

  “Okay…” the phone dies before I can finish. I put the phone on the kitchen table and take another lick from the bowl as the doorbell rings.

  Chapter 2

  As I walk to the door, Mr. Pepper comes running from upstairs screaming at me. I pull open the door, and my eyes trail up; suede brown Nike sneakers, blue jeans, and a white shirt tucked in with a brown leather jacket.

  And just like that, my small world shifts.

  Tall and slightly tanned, with short messy dark hair, sideburns, and dark stubble along his strong jaw, he looks down at me as he slides of his aviators. My heart slams against my chest as his silver stormy eyes underneath straight black brows lock with mine.

  “I’m sorry to intrude, my name is Joshua Roxwell, the guy at the gas station said you might know where to find Ben Slone.” His velvet husky voice carries a whiff of whiskey and spearmint.

  “Uhm, oh, you mean Luke,” I gulp.

  He seems slightly confused, and I realize that it’s because I’m thinking out loud again.

  “I mean, Luke’s the guy at the gas station, he works today.”

  Stop rambling. “I’m Sophie, uhm, Blake.”

  “Hi, Sophie Blake.” He gives me a panty-dropping smile, and I can feel my brain turn to mush.

  Oh, Lord! “Uhm, Ben will be at work. He’s a ranger at the Park…‌eh…‌I can call him if you’d like.”

  The one side of his mouth lifts as his eyes rake over my body, pinning me down under his brooding stare. “If you don’t mind.” His eyes linger a little longer, and I can feel my knees starting to shake.